1. A guy walks into the human resources department of a large company and hands the executive his application. The executive begins to scan the sheet, and notices that the applicant has been fired from every job he has ever held.
“I must say,”says the executive,“your work history is terrible.You’ve been fired from every job.”“Yes,”says the man.“Well,”continues the executive,“there is not much positive in that.”
“Hey!”says the guy as he pokes the application.“At least I’m not a quitter.”
一个人走进一家大公司的人力资源部,把他的申请表递给主管。主管开始浏览他的申请,发现应征者在以前的每一份工作上都被开除了。
“我必须说,”主管说,“你的工作经历很不好,你在你做的每一份工作上都被开除了。”“是的,”那人说。主管继续说:“这可不是什么好事情。”
“嘿!”那人指着申请表说,“至少我不是个逃兵。” 2.Always Thirsty"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me.""That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?" "No, but I am always thirsty!"一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。”“真是太糟糕了！”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗？”“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。” 3.I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
Hate丶生活 （讨厌）
Blue丶调调 （蓝色 - -，我想说的是蓝调）
God丶毒娘 （神，不解释。第一个用的是全角……所以算两个吧）
Vast丶冷却 （苍茫）
Tune丶花边 （调调。）
Daze丶烟花 （迷惑）
Deer丶斑比 （小鹿）
Pond丶月色 （池）
Air丶冷淡 （空，第一个依然全角）
Gaze丶空浊 （凝视）
Ldle丶蛋疼 （闲）
好吧，我确实是蛋疼了，~~o(>_<)o ~~，在谷哥哥哪里磨蹭了老半天才磨蹭出这些来~~~QAQ原谅我的愚笨吧~~~QAQ~~~前面的英文可以参考一下吧~~~~QAQ
